Its over and done

I had often heard people saying that the best way to speak your heart out is either to say it all to someone you could confine in or write it out. I chose to resort to the second way. It was becoming difficult for me to handle all the intricacies of the relation and the problems arising in there. So finally I decided to do what was the only option- I CALLED IT OFF!!

Sounds good :). Though I might feel the pain now and miss him like hell but in the long run I would be happy. Wondering on the moments I had with him, I feel like crying at times but as soon as I start thinking about the moments I would have had with him in future, I can't resist congratulating myself for this decision. It did not end in a hostile note, we still met and decided to be good frens (which I know would not work). All that I should do it stop all this at once and I will do that.

There are many things that remind me of him: waking up with his voice, sharing each and every thing with him, calling him when got nervous, shouting at him without reason, getting furious on seeing his frenly chat sessions with a girl, crying like a child with him, acting like crazy with him, his particular words and reactions which I could very well guess, his customized words :), my nickname kept by him, his gifts, sleeping at night with his voice, talking to him for around 16-18 hours a day. I used to talk to him more that my family and frens, so putting that all to hault at once could be a little problematic for me. I can handle that for sure as I know that what happened not is better that what would have happened at future.

I had always been a girl who would do anything and everything she wished. For the past one year I found many restrictions on myself. Now it feels as if I got my freedom and want to bring back the previous sumi to life. I want to stop existing and start living. Want to complete the sole purpose for which I came here, my career aspirations.

I know it won't be difficult. All that I would need is a lot of determination and the ability and vision to look at things the correct way.
Im done and overdone...its all over and a new beginning awaits me. Just want to go out and hold it with both hands and all strengths.